New Music!

As it is my birthday today (no, no - you are too kind!), I have been given a copy of the Mercury Award-winning CD by The XX. I haven't tackled some music out of my comfort zone (indie, Americana) for a while now. I shall report back later with initial thoughts....

All work and no play....

So, American child psychologists have concluded that reading children a bedtime story does nothing to help a child learn language skills. Having the child read the story increases their language development by a factor of six. Whoop-de-do! But, talk about missing the point of something....

How depressing must it be to see every hour of your child's day as an opportunity to engage in formal, structured learning activities? When getting them their breakfast in the morning you could be lecturing them about grain production in the USA and describing the milling process that produces cornflakes. Why not hide their school shoes under one of three baskets and make them guess where the shoes are while engaging them in a discussion on probability? Honestly, the possibilities are endless!

Or, perhaps you might want to consider that play is an important part of learning to be a person and that reading a story to a child at bedtime doesn't have to be all about a learning opportunity but could, instead, be about bonding, comforting and reassurance - telling the child that things are OK in their world.

As one of a generation of children that had bed time stories (following generations of children read to at bed time), I think I've turned out pretty well and I dont't feel deprived by missing out on having to solve ten calculus problems before lights out every night. Shouldn't whatever you do before you lay down to sleep be the opposite of stimulating? You want to go to sleep after all...

Actually, I quite fancy a cup of hot chocolate and a betime story tonight!

Harry Potter's Cloak

The cloak of invisibility. What a fine piece of kit that would be to own, even for just a few hours. Imagine - being able to go whereever you fancy, but completely undetected! (call it a wildassed guess, but it'd be somewhere involving women getting naked for the majority of men). Except, we don't need to be a scar-headed fictional character to enjoy invisibilty - no! We can bestow invisibility on ourselves using resources available to all. Read on...

When out driving, it is possible to render one's car invisible through the use of hazard lights! Can't be arsed parking the car  and walking to the cashpoint? Would you like to park on the double yellow lines but you're scared of parking nazis attendants? Well, fret no more. Simply park wherever you feel like and put your hazard lights on. Why? Because you will be rendered invisible! Parking wardens will simply ignore you and your fellow road users will appreciate the time for contemplation and reflection that is afforded by sitting in the queue you have created. Yes, hazard warning lights - the choice of lazy, inconsiderate tw*ts for years!

The second example concerns a business and political incantation. I have noticed the growing use of the phrase "As I understand it...." (AIUI) to preface an answer in the work environment and in answers given by politicians. Often, what it seems to mean is "What I think is this (although it may be nothing more than conjecture)..." or "This may possibly be totally wrong, but ...". It matters not a jot, though, because the quick-witted use of the phrase has protected you from any comeback. A third party has obviously given you duff info but your involvement has been rendered invisible in the transaction and you cannot be held responsible for anything that follows "AIUI..." . All because it was only "as you understiood it". Hey, I'll hold my hands up big style - I have found myself using it too. It is just so easy to slip into the protection of  that qualifying statement.

I'm generalising, of course. No way would most people park so inconsiderately. No way would we all be so risk averse that we can no longer speak freely without attempting to cover our backs, No way, right?

Heard or not heard

Story A on the news this morning: Tony McGurk, head of the Fire Brigade on Merseyside angered the TUC Conference yesterday by suggesting that there are too many lazy people employed in the public sector and steps should be taken to get rid of them. He used the draconian cuts in his own service (staffing cut by 40%) to illustrate what could be 'achieved'.

Story B again on the news, but about two stories later. Fire and rescue services in Britain are in a vulnerable position because they are thinly stretched and a flu epidemic laying low many members of staff could severely disrupt the service they provide. How come they are stretched so thi......oh, I think I see.

You've won! But.....

I just got my mark for the last assignment of my course and I am so pleased - 90%!! The best mark I've had out of the seven essays I've done. I am really, really pleased (sorry, I'm not about to do false modesty here). Now, I feel great and it's an achievement to be proud of and lots of people would be so happy with the outcome, but it leaves me with an average mark for the continuous assessment element of the course of 84%. And that means on paper, no matter how well I do in the exam, I cannot get a first.

Is that ungrateful? Yes, it probably is. In fact, when I started this course, I said to myself I had probably put too much time into the previous courses I had completed, even if it had paid off with good grades. I just felt I had given up on so much else - archery, going to watch the Shakers - that I should perhaps tone down my input on this course: just pass it; it doesn't matter about the grade; get a better balance between work (£), work (academic) and home and so forth. Yep, I'll do that...

But I didn't. You get a good grade for your first paper and you want to do better on the next and so forth. Your self-imposed 'bar of attainment' has been set and you want to keep raising it... Unfortunately, I had a 'blip' in the fourth essay - it was the one that I put together in outline when I was on holiday. Totally misinterpreted the question or rather, I answered the question I thought they wanted me to answer. I dropped some marks and that has blown my average by one point. I'll blame the red wine....

So here I am, feeling like the man who lost a pound and found a penny when I should feel really good about what I have achieved. Maybe it's just my 'bottle half-empty' mentality, which as is too often the case, hangs round the party like a supremely eggy fart. It's not the end of the world, not by a long chalk. No, I can still screw the exam up in four weeks time...